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you're the only thing i don't fear (demo collection)

by quiet radio collective

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1.
all of my late nights, mean nothing more, than idle conversation and people who don’t care on the floor, counting minutes and hours, it doesn’t move any faster, i can’t connect to any long lasting thing, i’m the loneliest of all constellations in the infinite void, should i be more respectful? do i have any choice? howling at the full moon like the sun won’t rise, falling in deeper to shallow eyes, it’s looks, it’s chemicals, it’s predetermined, it never gets better and it never stop hurting, i was on my feet, like i was about to leave, you were telling me things, i didn’t need to hear or at least i thought i didn’t need, opened like a wound that forgot to bleed, let the ice caps melt we’re all in this together, it’s a nice reminder nothing lasts forever, you think you’re evil, i know you’re going to heaven, you’re going to look beautiful with the rest of them, you take the high road, i’m taking the scenic route, with energy drinks and fast food bags, i’m going down the hellish path, howling at the full moon like the sun won’t rise, falling in deeper to shallow eyes, it’s looks, it’s chemicals, it’s predetermined, it never gets better and it never stop hurting,
2.
now we can’t find all the answers inside, i’m looking at you, you say it’s wrong, that i judge just because i have fear, all the shapes within the space do not fit how i wish, here comes the panic, here comes the stress, we’ve touched bottom, we’ve floated down the stream, i’ve found another lonely soul following me, we talk the same, talk rhythm over tongue, i said it’s over, you say we’re not done. it’s self imposed exile, not sad and unhappy, but i’m not gonna lie thats what i’ve got going, we talk in dark, we hear the same things, we listen to the weather hit off the glass panes, hold me when i’m sad, i’m not as strong as they want, but then we talk about it as if it’s our fault, nothing’s going to take away this sterile sensation, i want to leave the room, you want conversation. we’ve touched bottom, we’ve floated down the stream, i’ve found another lonely soul following me, we talk the same, talk rhythm over tongue, i said it’s over, you say we’re not done.
3.
the time has come to go, but i think i should stay, we walk to the church, that’s where you ask me, what happens after we die? i don’t know, i don’t know, but its so far away that i don’t care, stop coming in my bed, stop getting in my head, i don’t care about you, guilt trip me, oh you will, i’ll tie my laces even harder, i don’t care about you, you don’t care about me, please leave me alone, so next time you try to make me sad, i’ll put you in a bag and throw you down the stairs.
4.
it’s freezing in your bedroom and i am sat beside you, kisses hit your nose and but both our tongues are froze, to the roofs of our mouths, there’s no one in the house, still i ask the question, how many times can i say i love you? i want to give you presents early, kiss you until it hurts me, feel all of your body, i’m not to mentally sturdy, but neither are you, i want to be your fool, how many times can i say i love you?
5.
sensitive to light, don’t want to open the eyes, pupils dilate tonight, the confusion is something i can get behind, don’t worry about the other side, be afraid of the alive, they carry weapons, and words heavy enough to make angels cry in heaven, close your eyes, back with mine at the same time, don’t go dark into the good night without me by your side, close your eyes, back with mine at the same time, don’t go dark into the good night without me by your side i thought i could try, i never thought i’d fail, all those times mother looked into my eyes, she saw a baby scared of the world, now i’m scared of falling back close your eyes, back with mine at the same time, don’t go dark into the good night, without me by your side, close your eyes, back with mine at the same time, don’t go dark into the good night without me by your side
6.
now you’ve dived in can you get out? can you swim that far? are you floating? promoting your lifestyle? should i follow to the gallows? to see who you are or stay here, don’t disappear down there again
7.
it’s got to that point where i question who i am, am i who i want to be? what is my plan? will she break up with me, because i aint me, i know that im weak, but i don’t like it either she dropped her towel just for me there’s just so much regret, inside my head, can i live with it? or is penance my friend, i’ll drop to my knees, shove dirt in my mouth, recite all the bad things, like there’s no end to this she dropped her towel just for me
8.
you’re beating my heart, and holding on to the same old memories and the same old songs, still anxious in my heart, scared to look up, i’m sorry i don’t attract you my fears let me up, you want domination by ideal types, you claim creativity how i think you lied, how will ever forgive myself for your sakes, i used to love watching you get hurt, it’s come back to hurt me, it’s come back to. you’re changing you’re different i want to stay the same i’m going to miss the way you say i love you followed by my name we are individuals for better or for worse i would have liked a limo but you wanted a hearse how will i ever forgive myself for your sake, its come back to haunt me how many times must i be a shadow of myself just because a situation got the best of my health, im addicted to mattress the comfort of myself, but i won’t do this forever, i won’t do this forever, i cant lose the optimism the stupid chance i feel start thinking about the end and reinvent the wheel, i hope we meet again, we might i feel, but until then stay naive and stupid.
9.
i look at you undressed, i’ll talk to while you’re depressed, i wish we could talk in person, because i’m sick of preplanned arrangements, i’ll talk to you for hours, i'll show you my cd collection, and we can have sex and just jive to led zeppelin, leave your socks on the floor, and fears at the door, so we can enjoy this where did our minds go, did they fall right out of our skulls, we’re the only manic preachers, what a fulfilling role, swans never break your arms, dogs never wink back, if you ever get robbed, they’re never gonna bring your stuff back to you, so learn from your lessons, and love your grandparents, because you know why, i don’t care you threw your ring in the bin, you’re still my favourite guy i love you where did our minds go, did they fall right out of skull, we’re the only manic preachers, what a fulfilling role, is everyone suicidal deep down inside? or am i choosing friends who are the same as i? where did our minds go, did they jump out of our skulls, we’re the only manic preachers, what a fulfilling role,
10.
i don't know if it's sunlight or light pollution, but i have came to my final solution, down with common misleading facts, up with the good times don't make me laugh, liar liar like i have something to hide, how will i tell her i'm empty inside, insert false romance, reminiscing love, we're all screaming we've had enough, we all need better lifestyles right now, stop beating me up, you're not entitled you are young, and naive about about who you love, i need to stop comparing myself to everyone around, because they are winning and i'm losing, but i'm losing hard, on my own, in my own way, these are things that i am faced with, these are things that i hate, i am the problem i create, i asked her to tell her what she thought of me, she looked to the sea and said maybe, matter of fact the truths not there, i got nervous and i broke my stare, because you're everything inside my head, how i will be empty when you're not there, i won't hold, i won't move on, we all need better lifestyles right now, stop beating me up, you're not entitled you are young, and naive about about who you love, i need to stop comparing myself to everyone around, because they are winning and i'm losing, but i'm losing hard, on my own, in my own way, these are things that i am faced with, these are things that i hate, i am the problem i create,
11.
when the ice caps melt and there’s darkness in the sky, when the deserts are cracked i’ll be by your side, when the wars begin and the bullets fly, don’t believe it will last, i will be by your side, when we’re smiling in the sun on that carousel ride, toffee in our teeth, i'll be by your side, when the day is done and we go into good night, don’t worry darling ill be by your side

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released November 4, 2022

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quiet radio collective Sunderland, UK

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